Standard.
Jesus You alone are my standard. Inasmuch as there are people I admire in the faith (which are very few), I still choose to model my life after You.
I choose to measure my growth based off Your Word. I choose to test the fruit in my life according to Your Word. I choose to base my convictions off Your Word. I will not allow how someone else is living to be the determining factor of how I live my life. YOU ALONE are my God.
Thankfully, I've never really been one to follow the crowd and I'm grateful for that. The danger in allowing other people to be the standard in our life is that they become our god. At that point, we are not certain what You expect from us because according to others, anything is permitted.
Friend, I encourage you to seek out a personal relationship with Jesus. Do not allow the way other believers live to be an indicator of how you live. If other believers are listening to secular music but you know that you have a conviction not to, then don't. If other believers are dressing immodestly and you know you're not supposed to, then don't. If other believers are gossiping about a minister but aren't praying, then don't join them because scripture is against that!
Now this is not just about do's and don'ts. We don't have to get legalistic here. If it was just about do's and don'ts then you've missed the point. This is about allowing Jesus to be the standard of your life.